Mithu and I were enjoying a cup of tea and talking about life in general and changing fortunes.
I tried to explain to her that wealth and Poverty are two sides of the same coin and they are intertwined and part and parcel of life.
Wealth by definition is the abundance of valuable financial assets or physical possessions which can be converted into a form that can be used for transactions. This includes the core meaning as held in the originating old English word weal, which is from an Indo-European word stem.Children born into wealthy or well off families and often referred to as "Silver Spoons". These children get anything they want in life, as their parents can afford them. Some wealthy parents try to be strict with their children so they are disciplined in life and are frugal, but does not work always.
Children born to poorer parents learn to do with what the parents can afford, eat what the family can afford do with minimum and learn not to yearn for what they cannot afford
Mithu is a Silver spoon as her Dad was a Notary Public in Malaysia, Personal Physician to the Sultan and Medical Superintendent of a Hospital. He was not a Billionaire but well off and Mithu was his favourite. All she had to do was "Ask" and her father would get it for her.
I met Mithu in 1977. In 1978 January on my return from Madras I stopped by in Singapore to meet Mithus Parents. Got picked up at the airport and went home and my first reaction was "Rich People- Posh House many cars".... next thought was OMG Mithu could be a "Silverspoon".
A Day later Mithu and I flew back together to Sydney as UNI was reopening after the vacation. What happened next was an eye opener.
Besides her suitcase and hand luggage Mithu pulled out seven card board boxes of different sizes and said Baba bought this Pioneer Audio system for me and we are taking it back to sydney. This system cost more than the return airfare.
I had to hide my thoughts and said Wow wonderful, Lucky You and in fact I was thinking you Spoilt Brat.
We landed at Sydney airport and the Customs officer asked me are you both really students ? "I cannot afford a system like this.."
I on the other hand was not born into a very poor family but my Dad was a Central Govt Servant in Andamans and that meant he had to maintain two homes one in Andamans until he retired and another in Madras. It was after my Dad Retired from his Job in Andamans 1958 as Asst Commissioner of Andaman and Nicobar Islands and moved lock stock barrel to Madras, the family got into financial strife. Something went wrong and he did not get his Government pension for three long years. Imagine maintaining a family of 9 in a rented property with no income. Was tough.
This meant that he had to find a job and start all over in Madras. He got a Job as Secretary of the Seva Samajam Boys home an orphanage.
My Dads Golden Words of Wisdom to us was "I do not have any property or money to give you children but I have done my best to give you all quality educations so you can all stand on your own feet."
He in fact wanted a Family of doctors so three of my sisters became doctors making him very happy but I broke loose, as I was always a numbers man and my dad grudging accepted my decision to Join IIT but only after he made a sneak visit to IIT Madras Campus and studied the Campus and the hostels and even talked to some senior students. His Initial reaction was No IIT Bit Cit go to Guindy engg college. He assumed IIT was a Polytechnic Diploma Course. One Trip on IIT Bus Kailash took him to heaven...
My sisters called me Thyagarama (Rama who Sacrifices) as I put myself last always.
My Mother's words of Wisdom to me were "Put the Donkey Last" meaning look after your sisters first before yourself. So when a Birthday cake had to be cut, the engineer me would count the number of family members including servants and precision cut into 6,8,or 10 pieces. At the dinner table I will make sure everyone has served themselves before I even start. It was all about sharing and ensuring no one missed out and as a family the rule was not to waste one morsel of food on the plate. You don't take more food than you can eat and throw in in the garbage. More than my mother, my Dad was like an eagle looking at everyones plate and he had to give his nod before anyone could leave the dining table.
These habits good and bad are cultivated in each family from the Cradle to the grave.
Going Back to the wealthy and Poor I was trying to explain to Mithu that this is a Cyclic Phenomenon.
Children born to poor parents do it tough learn to survive with what they can afford, focus on their studies so they can become professionals and have good careers and have a Comfortable & Wealthy life.
Children born to rich parents aka Silverspoons live in laps of luxury and take things for granted become lazy people who indulge themselves and squander the fathers money and become paupers.
This happened to my Paternal Great Grandfather. He was a Brick Merchant of his times Filthy Rich, owned all the houses in two major streets in Saidapet, was the Local Temple Patron ands believe it or not he owned his Private Chariot drawn by TWO PURE White Horses which was a status symbol like Driving a White Rolls Royce.
My Great Grand Father had Four sons, my grandfather was the eldest and three younger brothers. Being the eldest my Grandfather inherited the business and the Property. He I believe was an alcoholic and a womaniser, so his own brothers conspired and tricked him into signing a legal document that gave all his wealth away to his three brothers. Two of them went to Andamans and squandered the new found wealth trying to do some business
My Dad got Zilch from his Wealthy Grand father and he had to start all over again
So when you make money don't show off and squander it and when you run low on finances don't despair as that is not the end of the world
A week Later I received this whatsapp forward to re emphasise my thoughts:
WOW What Inspirational Words of Wisdom
